Friday, May 25, 2007

Hello? This is God calling...

Yesterday, I walked into Panera as a successful non-profit owner, carrying 2 binders, 3 zip drives, and a pen. 

Two hours later, after signing lots of papers and shaking a few hands, I walked out alone. 

Without the pen. 

And no longer a business owner. 

In all honesty, I was more relieved than I thought I'd be and a lot more sad than I thought I'd be. As I sat in my car, I didn't quite know what to do. Cry? Laugh? Eat? I couldn't even think of whom to call...Michael was in a meeting and he was the only person I really wanted to talk to. I decided to go sit in my garden, and as I was driving there, my phone rang. It was a number I didn't recognize and while I NEVER answer my phone, I did.

Turns out it was God calling.

OK, so it wasn't really Him on the phone, but it was a woman whose daughter I had placed in camps for the last 2 summers. She called to tell me that Melissa died in January of ALL (leukemia) and that CCC had given her so much to look forward to each year and she just felt this need to call and tell me. After talking for a few minutes, I decided to tell her what had just happened...that CCC began after a decade of prayer and a giant leap of faith. That in 4 years we placed 4,300 kids in summer camps. That it got so big, so fast, and took on a life of it's own and needed to become incorporated and develop the whole board of directors thing in order to better help kids. That I had to choose between taking it there and being the Mom I felt I needed (and wanted) to be. That I labored over this decision for almost a year before doing something about it. That I had JUST signed away all the rights an hour before. That God told her I needed her to call me.

I came home and decided to pull up the website one last time...just to look. And guess what? It was gone. It had already been pulled.

God was telling me to move on and let it go. And He has given me peace. Again. 


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